Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize