They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
