What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
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