paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
