I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Randomize