I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
