I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
