Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
