It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
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