You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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