please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Randomize
