This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
