Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Randomize
