New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
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