so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
