I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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