I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
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