His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
