Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
jump out the window naked night went bad
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
