Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
