did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Randomize