I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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