This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Sober January is a disaster.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Randomize
