You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
