I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize
