I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Randomize
