he thought i was a dude.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize