Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
