just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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