He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I DEMAND FORESKIN
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
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