ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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