I want to have your abortion
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Randomize
