Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize
