Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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