My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize