I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize