What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
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