Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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