If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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