Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize