: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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