Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize
