About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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