He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
