How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
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