This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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