pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Randomize