no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize
