once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
he told me I talked like a deaf person
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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