She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Randomize
