Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize